Sad.... ( again)

I just dont know where to begin. Last night we ( my sister and I) found out that they are putting my grandma in a nursing home. I so dont agree to it but who am I to tell that to the family. They say Grandma is too much work and requires to much help. Ok I am not there because I live 2000 miles away and I dont see the day to day stuff that is required of her but I know what Grandpas last wishes seemed to be and it was NOT to see her in a nursing home, assisted care or not. He wanted her in her house the house she has known forever. Its her forever place. Hell its my forever place its where I can call home no matter what life brings me I know that I can go home to Grandmas house. Now I have no forever home. I feel like I am being selffish. I know deep down I am not selffish about it.
I know that taking Grandma from the home she knows best while she is in her later years will only make her go that much faster. Its not fair to her she just lost her husband in July, the only one who truely cared for her the way she needed to be cared for. Grandpa didnt want to go to heaven alone he even asked Grandma if she was ready and she said no Ill come later. Ok.. I am sure Grandpa thought the boys would take care of her the way he did. I am guessing Grandpa thought they wouldnt put her in a Assisted Living home. I am guessing becuase of the size of hte family we have he would have assumed that someone would step up to teh plate and take care of her. We know that Grandma wont live forever but why not let her live out her final days in the house they had together. I just dont understand it.  I keep hoping for a sign that its ok. The Stubbornness in me says get on a plane and go ask Grandma myself what she wants if she wants to stay where they are putting her or if she wants to live at her house with her things. And if she says she wants to live in her own house get her and go out and take her back to her house and stay with her til her final days. I know that seems like a lot for a 31 year old to take on but I always said I would move home and care for them in there dying days. They cared for all of us while we were growing up shouldnt we give them the same respect as they get older? Maybe Im not making any sense but in my head it all makes sense.
Grandma and Grandpa have a dog and now that Grandma is being put in a nursing home they are saying the dog isn't doign all that well. No shit the dog has lost the only person that has known. My grandpa was everythign to the dog. Animals grieve. and like with humans grief is different for everyone. He is just sad people get over it, let him live out his doggy life. Give him extra loves and cuddles dont just say he isnt doing well and put him down. I know thats what they are going to do and its unfair. Send me Rover he will fit in great with my two dogs and I would be happy to let him live out his life happy and LOVED.

Ok so for those of you who think im being selfish oh well I have a right to feel the way I do. I have the right to have these feelings and NOONE can take them away from me. For those of you who agree Thanks I apperciate it. Family should care for family and thats jsut the way its suppose to be.



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